My 211, was borrowed through the national student loan.

I have also been working part-time outside, earning a living for myself.

The one hundred thousand yuan that Mom risked her life for, Dad didn't give me a penny.

Later, after I graduated, I joined a well-known law firm, saved up some money, added it to Mom's life-saving money, and bought a house in our county town.

It wasn't until then that my family had a house of our own to live in.

Everything seemed to be heading in a positive direction, but then I was diagnosed with stomach cancer.

The doctor said it was due to my irregular eating habits over the years.

The doctor said it was in the late stage.

The doctor said that with proper chemotherapy, maybe I could live for another six months.

Six months.

Then I won't live anymore.

Anyway, being a waste like me, living doesn't mean much.

Forget it.

I'll go home and see my family, after all, since graduating from college, I haven't been back to that small town.

I took the green train back to our county, feeling that in these years, there had been earth-shattering changes in my family.

The river flowing through the county was filled in, a park was built on it, and the previous wasteland is now filled with high-rise buildings.

But Dad hasn't changed, he still hates me as always.

He hates that I make him lose face, make him fail, he said I ruined his whole life.

Maybe I really am a waste.

But now it doesn't matter.

Dad took out his account book again, I don't need to think, I know what he's writing.

He wrote that he has sacrificed a lot for me.

He wrote that although he hasn't brought a penny home in all these years, he has put a lot of effort into educating his children.

But I disappointed him, I let him down.

Over the years, he changed his tune, he said that 211 is not bad.

He was still quite proud.

Later on, Dad found a job teaching at a private school, he taught well, and it was said that he was recognized as an outstanding teacher.

Dad had more to say, a teacher who could be recognized as outstanding, dedicated years to educating me at home, and yet this was the outcome.

So, I am, a waste.

It doesn't matter anymore.

A waste, I won't live anymore.