After entering the house, Dad questioned me, "Li Juan, why are you back? I have no money. Your younger brother is getting married."

I lowered my head, looking at the tip of my shoe, and said, "I didn't come back for money, I just... wanted to see you all."

"You are so kind? It's really rare..."

I tried my best to ignore the sarcasm in Dad's tone.

I just took it as a compliment.

The winter in the northwest is very cold. I walked into the bedroom and turned on the air conditioner.

Dad knocked frantically on my room door, "Li Juan, can you save some electricity for me! You, a useless person like this, how come you're not frozen to death? Your brother is getting married, the bride price is 188,000, don't you know?"

So, I turned off the air conditioner.

Useless.

The word "useless" has been a constant in my short life.

When did it start?

I can't remember.

It seems that from the moment I was born, I was Dad's "useless" in his mouth.