I don't know how long I have been running, my heart is about to jump out of my throat.

I finally ran back to school.

The school was brightly lit, with faint sounds of reading.

"I was born to be a high mountain, not a stream. I want to look down on the mediocrity of ravines from the top of a mountain."

"I was born to be an outstanding person, not a weakling. I stand on the shoulders of giants and look down upon the cowardly."

I rushed into the school, a thin female teacher was standing at the school gate. In the moment I rushed towards her, everything around me shattered like a popped bubble.

The walls of books piled high above formed a Gothic steep dome over my head. When I looked back, there was no sign of my parents chasing me outside the book walls.

They were blocked outside the walls.

The teacher unfolded two sheets of paper in front of me, the same strange rules from the vestibule and the taxi.

I asked her, " What are these rules?"

"Arrogance, prejudice, ignorance, oppression. And some other insignificant garbage."

She tore the rules into pieces:

"It's all over."

Extra

[Delivery girl's diary]

This was the twenty-fourth time this year that I delivered meals in the middle of the night to the girl in Unit 7, Building 3.

She seemed to be a boarding student who could only go home on weekends.

Every time I delivered food to her, she was very cautious, always looking through the peephole for a long time.

I think she must be very scared.

When I was a little girl, I was often scared of being harmed by bad people when I was alone.

I showed her the necklace I had just bought, but she seemed even more afraid.

Alas, living is really hard.

[Male taxi driver's WeChat chat record]

Hey wife, let me tell you, just now was too much.

In the middle of the night, a little girl gets into my car alone to go to school.

Wasn't it yesterday that one woman was murdered by a taxi driver? The traffic news was talking about it.

The look on her face, oh my, it's as if I were the murderer.

Do you know what's even more absurd?

When she got off the car, she actually asked if she could go home with me.

I'm not making this up, there's nothing to exaggerate. I was scared at the time.

It's very scary. It's late at night, long hair, draped over, and she was wearing a white dress.

Lucky that I didn't do anything unscrupulous.

If I didn’t know any better, I'd think she was a ghost.

I've decided that I won’t take female passengers at night anymore.

I don't care how they get home, what if something happens and it's blamed on me? I can't do it

It's more dangerous outside for them than for me. At least I won't be extorted for money, right?

[Mother's diary]

I have always said that girls don't have to go to school. The girl who had an education didn't listen to me.

What good can come out of a free school?

Now look, she's not getting married when she should be, and now she's gone back to school.

Isn't Xiao Wang a great match for her?

He's rich, and he likes her.

So what if he hits his wife? How many men don't beat their wives?

It's a shame that she didn't come home during the college entrance examination, and the admission notice didn't come to the house.

Otherwise, she would have to get married before anything else.

[My diary]

Finally graduated!

I used to say to my deskmate, preparing for the college entrance examination cured my psychological suffering.

It did more than that.

It also cured my neurosis ~

After having a good daily schedule and a free life plan, I no longer saw those strange things.

When I'm home alone, I still don't dare to open the door to get takeout.

When I take a taxi alone at night, I still worry if the driver has ulterior motives.

When my brother was born, I didn't do anything, but I became the target of my peers' ridicule, and the ungrateful daughter in the eyes of my relatives.

It's rumored that a person will die three times in their life.

The first time is brain death, which means the body is dead.

The second time is the funeral, meaning they have died in society.

The third time is being forgotten, when no one in this world cares about that person anymore, that's when they are completely dead.

I often dream about the funeral in that dream from my youth.

At that time, I was ill, but I didn't think I was crazy.

I just saw very specifically: how, while I was still alive, the people around me pronounced the social relationships and existential meaning death of me.

It was a gentle sacrifice under the cloak of civilization, trying to turn me into a real walking corpse.

I crossed the single narrow bridge of the college entrance examination and saved myself with all my might.

Now

, there is still no bed to sleep in at home.

And I, as if I didn't need one anymore.

(End of full text)

Author: Don't scratch my gauze window